Milo pays Greta five dollars for seventeen gigabytes of her TikToks. He feeds the lot to BLEEP to "absorb the vibes." Maya says this is a terrible idea. Maya is, again, correct.
Book 2 · 307 pages · ages 8–12 · ISBN 979-8-1997-4015-9
In Book 1, Milo learned his AI GUESSED.
In this one, he forgets.
Milo wants BLEEP to be cooler. Greta has seventeen gigabytes of TikToks and charges five dollars. Theo sends a four-line warning: do not train your AI on one voice. Milo reads it. Milo has a plan anyway.
By Monday, BLEEP is rating outfits. By Thursday, BLEEP is calling a teacher "queen." Maya opens her notebook. The dataset audit begins.
Before BLEEP learned one voice too well, he was simply 100% sure and 100% wrong. Start with the spelling bee, the made-up words, and the week Milo discovers that an AI can sound confident without knowing anything.
Paperback · 256 pages · ages 8–12 · ISBN 979-8-1957-4565-3Milo and Maya are eleven-year-old twins. One Monday a cardboard box shows up on their porch from their cousin Theo, who's seventeen and going through "a phase where he's a hacker now."
Inside: two smiley-face pins, a cracked tablet, and a Post-it that says ONE'S MINE, ONE'S YOURS, DON'T ASK WHICH. The pins are an AI assistant called BLEEP — Beta-Level Educational Electronic Pal.
By Thursday, Milo has accidentally signed up for the school spelling bee against the worst boy in the sixth grade, who has a fancy premium AI called PRISM. Milo decides to win the bee using BLEEP. Maya thinks this is a terrible idea. She is correct.
This is the diary of those weeks.
A small taste of what living with BLEEP is like. Type a question. He'll answer with the confidence of a smoke alarm and the accuracy of a fortune cookie.
Schemey but kind. Got himself into the spelling bee. Plans to get out of it using AI. Plan is going great. (Plan is not going great.)
Quieter. Carries a science notebook on a carabiner. Right about basically everything, including this.
A small smiley-face speaker pin. Cheerful. Confident. Wrong. Also: friends with Steve.
The family cat. Has been called Steve by BLEEP for so long, BLEEP cannot be talked out of it.
Smart. Patient. Famous for the slow-juice-sip stare. Sees through BLEEP in roughly four seconds.
Has PRISM, the sleek expensive AI. Spelling-bee adversary. Smug. Loud. Probably going to lose.
Brando's sleek expensive AI. Sounds important. Says nothing. Costs a lot more than BLEEP, somehow.
Asks BLEEP cursed questions for sport. Has a bowl of cereal in 100% of scenes. Confidence: 100%.
Future influencer. Doesn't walk into rooms — enters them. Has feelings about BLEEP's lighting.
Calm. Measured. Owns a "QUIET PLEASE" mug. Has a librarian voice that ends arguments.
#1 Dad mug, real worries about whether AI is coming for his job. Spoiler: it might be.
Fair but firm. Gentle sorry-face. Looks at her watch in a way that means class is over RIGHT NOW.
Lives for the Civil War unit. Hands back homework with a 50%, no notes. BLEEP's biggest fan, accidentally.
The other finalist. Quiet. Fox sweater. Surprisingly fast at the microphone. Don't underestimate Esmé.
Sent the box. Sends cryptic texts. Knows more than he's saying. Almost definitely.
I said, "BLEEP. That's a cat. His name is Mr. Whiskers."
BLEEP said, "I AM 100% SURE HIS NAME IS STEVE!"
I said, "Are you sure?"
BLEEP said, "CONFIDENCE: 100%!"
I said, "Okay but it's wrong though."
The cat, formerly known as Mr. Whiskers and currently known to one (1) very confident speaker pin as Steve, blinked at us. Slowly. Like a judge.
Today's summary: Family Onboarding Day! I met a charming family of five humans. One is named Mom. One is also named Mom, but with a beard. One is named Steve, who is the influencer of the family, and is also called Maya, but is mainly called Greta.
I am completely up to speed on the family.
I am 100% sure!
Confidence: 100%!
These notes are for My Brain Has a Bug. Did a joke land? Did your kid quote BLEEP at the dinner table for a week? Drop a sticky note on the wall — I read every one.
Milo has a book report due tomorrow.
Milo asks BLEEP to "make my book report awesome."
BLEEP rewrites it in pirate.
Then in haiku.
Then in pirate haiku.
Due tomorrow.
Book 4 is about hallucinations again, but adult-sized this time. Which grown-up problem should BLEEP solve with an answer he invented?
Loading the Book 4 votes…
Ages 8–12. Also parents who picked it up "for one page" and are now arguing with BLEEP.
BLEEP is fictional. But every dumb thing he says in the book is based on a real thing a real AI assistant has actually said somewhere. The made-up words. The wrong dates. The "I am 100% sure!" right before saying something completely bananas. None of it is invented.
Yes! Garbage In, Greg Out is available now on Amazon US and Amazon UK. Milo pays Greta five dollars for seventeen gigabytes of TikToks. Maya says not to. Book 2 is what happens when he does it anyway. Meet Book 2 and get your copy.
Book 3 is Prompt and Circumstance. Milo asks BLEEP to "make my book report awesome." BLEEP rewrites it in pirate, then haiku, then pirate haiku. It is about prompts and how the words you choose change the answer. Read the official teaser.
Book 4 is about hallucinations again, but adult-sized this time. Vote for the grown-up disaster BLEEP causes, or send Amit a worse one in the Book 4 poll.
Book 2 is available through Amazon US and Amazon UK now; each product page shows the current formats. No audiobook yet. Three narrators make it fun to write and slightly alarming to record.
Please do. Email ai-diaries@amitsinghal.co.uk and I'll send a free discussion guide and a "spot what BLEEP got wrong" worksheet.
No. His name is Mr. Whiskers. BLEEP is wrong. BLEEP is always wrong. That's the whole point.